Saturday, December 13, 2008
{ 9:15 PM }
today's game was fun :) haha, I say that like at the start of every post x) but it is true! X: I suppose, I'm just trying to live my life :D hee. kay, whatever bull xD guess what! I read the first few pages of my literature text (the curious incident of the dog in the night-time, wow, that was long -.=") &I saw the word fuck! xD I think, twice! LOL.
whoaaaaa.. Ms. Ruby chose a vulgar book xD hahas. well, I think she chose it ><" besides, she knows that we love to say fuck >< &she doesn't really care much bout it, lol. hmm, so anyway, today after the game.. homed.
so now, let me share a little about the inner me :) hahas. okay, bullshitting again! xD anyway, back to seriousness. I had this crush when I was 7. fine, I know its bloody young to be having crushes -.=" my first crush was when I was 5 for God's sake. lol. back to my 7 year old crush :) I sat next to him during Mother Tongue class. that was where my teacher putted me :D I'm glad she did. LOL. so, I pretty much had a major crush on him. he was cute ^^ okay no, hot. &allow me to correct myself,
is hot! xD &somehow, that crush has never fade. when I was primary 6, he sat next to me again in Mother Tongue class. we were in the same group. &I realise that the feeling was still there but I thought maybe its because I used to like him, therefore it was awkward for me. then when we parted from primary school, found his friendster. we KIT from there :) added on msn, &chatted. we share problems, most of the time about relationship, in fact, I believe its all the time! xD we were like.. best friends. I love that. I really do. we flood each other's friendster profile once awhile :) he send me those chain mails on my profile. I sent him an original one from me :D hahas. then, suddenly, a few days ago when we chatted, I could realise that he wasn't himself. I asked him to open up to me. he told me that his girlf. was jealous. yea well, being the casanova he is, his a flirt. I gotta admit that. I told him to change his ways if he ever wants to have a stable relationship. then I told him that if he can't change then at least get a girlf. that knows you for the flirt you are&doesn't mind. &I actually made myself an example X: I told him that I don't mind if my boy was a flirt, just as long as I know that its me who he loves. at that moment, I realised that I was imagining myself as his girlf. &that was simply wrong of me! he is attached!
I wouldn't want to ruin everything between him&his girl but I wish.. for once(?), would the guy I like just return my love? I'm tired of going through so much lovelorn. I simply envy Iman. she gets all the guys that she likes. why can't I? /: why do I always get the wrong ones?
I'm just not wanted, aren't I?
